Mmmm I love the taste of burritos! Spicey and zesty! Especially with extra cheese! Me gustaria queso!!! I made these wonderful delicious mini-breakfast-burritos the other day.

Recipe Yield:

10 mini burritos

10 regular size flour tortillas
1 can refried beans (I used the Zesty Salsa flavor)
8 ounces shredded cheddar cheese
18 eggs, scrambled
22 ounces (1 package) chorizo
8 tbsp butter, divided
Salt and pepper, to taste

The rest of the recipe is here

What inspired me to make mini breakfast burritos is a long story. It all started when, yesterday afternoon, the Hispanic landscapers came over to our house to cut the grass and trim the bushes. While they were working, I cooked an early dinner for my hubby. We ate together, watched a short TV show, and then I kissed him goodbye as he went off to work another night shift at the office. After he left, the sun was still out, and the mexicans (or whatever, they were brown people) were still in the backyard cutting the grass and trimming the bushes. Then I noticed a few more landscapers had arrived, which was suspicious, since he said earlier that he only hired 3!! I started to get really concerned. I swear, one of the men started peaking through the window repeatedly just to look at me, and another man winked at me! Right there and then I knew they were going to break into the house and rape me, so I reached over to the phone to call the POLICE! The dispatcher had a really sarcastic tone of voice when he told me to stay in the house and lock all the doors. I begged him to send someone over, but he just laughed and hung up. Why are our tax dollars going to these shitty police departments that don’t help damsel in distress like me?!?! I started to cry out of panic, because my house and home was surrounded by scary brown people with hedge clippers, leaf blowers, and other weapons.

To my horror there was a knock on the door. I slowly tip-toed to the front door to look through the peephole. I saw sweaty Mexicans staring back with angry blood shot eyes, the kind that read “kill white people.” One of them knocked again and said, “Senorita, where’s our fucking money?! You’re husband said he would pay us but he isn’t here. We know you are in there!” He just kept knocking and yelling; “bitch, open the door, we built his deck last week and he still never pay us!” I was so scared that if I didn’t do something, the Mexicans would stay here all night and kill my hubby when he got back from work. I had to do something!! I knew it was either me or my hubby, so I let the mexicans in.

They quickly rushed in, all 10 of them, and closed the door behind them and locked it. They yelled at me in Spanish, but I didn’t understand any of it. One of them started looking around, like he wanted to steal our stuff! Another Mexican was reaching for something in his pants, I was sure it was a knife! I knew to save my life and my hubby’s, I had to pay them somehow. So I took off all of my clothes and lied down on the floor. I closed my eyes, held still, and waited. I heard them talking in Spanish for 3 minutes, until one of them spoke up and said, “ok, you have no money, I understand, it’s ok we leave!” They started walking toward the door when I opened my eyes and got up. I got in front of them and the door, I wasn’t going to let them leave!!! I mean, what if they still wanted to kill my hubby? So I got on my knees and unzipped one of them below the waist. They all formed a line and I gave all 10 of them blow jobs for the next 4 hours!  My face was covered in jizz, but I knew I had done the right thing for my hubby! Some of the jizz got in my eyes, so one of the really nice mexican men got his leaf-blower and blew it off my face so I wouldn’t have to get up and go to the bathroom. Most of it dried onto and my face and was still sticky, but at least I could see without my eyes hurting!

After all the Mexican men put their pants back on I started to feel guilty cheating on my husband, but then I realized I didn’t actually have sex. I just gave them all 10 of them blowjobs, that’s not cheating!? Is it? I asked them if that was enough, if they’d let my hubby live! One of them smiled and said no! I couldn’t believe it! After all I had done! I knew it wasn’t over. So I said fine, and invited them to my bedroom and let them rape me all night. I woke up still feeling exhausted and violated, and totally dirty, but I knew Jesus would understand that I did it to save my hubby. I did the right thing, and the Mexicans were nice enough to let me pay them without money. As the sun rose, I made them all these mini breakfast burritos before they left.

Later that day after the Mexicans left, my hubby returned with money. I asked him what the money was for, he said he was late paying the landscapers! Ughhh, I was so tempted to tell him what I had done, and that he should give me that money but I kept my mouth shut.

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